Rapture Ready
I dunno...when I saw this sign I thought of a late night TV commercial... "Are you Rapture Ready? You need the Acme Industries Rapture Preparedness Kit. Whether it is zombies, vampires or just your typical rabble of demons from hell, whatever you use for your scenario of the End Times, we have you covered with customized kits for every creed, cult and conspiracy theory!
At Acme Industries we have items for any and every contingency. From Rune Stones to Zoroastrian Amulets to fragments of the True Cross, we have scoured the world to find the items you need for your eternal ease. The Acme Rapture Preparedness Kits are the cutting edge in Apocalyptic Anxiety Accessories and you can ease your mind today for the low, low price of 19.99.
But wait, if you order within the next 20 minutes you can get Two Acme Rapture Preparedness Kits for the price of one! Yes, that's two for the low price of 19.99! Share your sense of security with a loved one or increase your odds of standing with the right team...
But wait there's more! For a short time only, with every order we will include include a wooden stake that has been blessed by a genuine ordained minister and a 4 ounce bottle of hand sanitizer that is guaranteed effective against all space-born viruses. All for the low price of 19.99 (plus shipping and handling) Get yours today! Call now!
Rapture
Acme Industries